A Woman Leads the Band

Titles are difficult. For years, I floated through life undercutting any achievements while expertly conducting the negative cacophony that played in my head. Women are taught from a very young age to be careful about being confident about their achievements. I mean we wouldn’t want the world to think us “uppity.” My mom was a card-carrying feminist. She dragged me to ERA/NOW meetings and was one of the first subscribers to Ms. Magazine. It didn’t seem to make a difference—I still got indoctrinated as to be careful about my place in the world. The best example of this fear of labeling myself was straight out of college. I refused to call myself an actor because I wasn’t earning a living at it and the all too common joke would be: “Really? How great! Where do you wait tables?” A "Real" Dancer Twenty-plus years of being a working dancer and becoming vested in my union, I still had a hard time using the title “dancer” for fear of what others would think. Never mind that I had danced on Film/TV/ The Oscars, traveled the world because I could learn real choreography, and people wanted to watch me dance. It didn’t matter that I took dance classes for years. I was not a “real” dancer—I was an actor who could move. I finally let that go a few years ago. It took many of the professional dancers whom I respect so greatly to assure me that no matter how much I he